What is polyamory?

What Is Polyamory?

      What is polyamory or poly, what does it mean and what does it involve?

       Wikipedia defines polyamory as:

                                              "Polyamory is the practice of, or desire for, intimate relationships with more than one partner, with the knowledge of all partners. It has been described as "consensual, ethical, and responsible non-monogamy".  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory

       

The infinity heart symbol of polyamory

     

         Non-monogamy in and of itself is a broad term and may define many relationships and circumstances with polyamory being just one. People in a "non-mon" relationship can be open, semi-open, polyamorous, polygamists etc or a combination. Non-mon relationships work differently for each relationship and aren't the same for everyone and they also evolve and change as time goes on and as situations and life change. In consensual and responsible non-mon relationships there are rules and conditions and there are conversations that are had and are not entered into lightly.

       Polyamory like any relationship are unique and are not standard. People in poly relationships are able to make their own rules and make it work for them and their needs and desires. There is no wrong or right way to be poly or to have a poly relationship. Some have a relationship in which the partners, married or not, seek and date others more or less together and seek a tight-knit relationship with all involved. Others have a relationship, again married or not, where each partner seeks and dates others independent of one another. Still others aren't in one single relationship and may date couples, other single polyamorist or a combination. There are so many different varieties and combinations it would take a fairy large article to cover them all.

      There are some common aspects of poly relationships that you can find throughout most poly and non-mon exchanges. Here are a few that in my opinion are some of the most important 

•        Consensual, meaning that all parties involved know and agree to the poly aspect. Whether it be a couple dating others together or separate or a single person dating or seeing multiple people everyone involved should know and agree to the situation and have the opportunity to talk and set up their own rules and parameters.
•        Responsible. I believe this is key in that you are responsible to more than just yourself and you have a responsibility to be open an honest with those involved. Without this things can become sour with mis-trust and doubts, but holding yourself and others responsible can keep things in check.
•        Communication. Possibly the most important thing of all. Communication is so important because without it things just can't run smoothly, There are feelings and thoughts and emotions and there are more than just your typical two people in a typical monogamous relationship. Communication is also key because you need it to ensure that all involved know the parameters and expectations and what is expected. There needs to be an open line of communication and each person involved should feel free and open to share with the others,

       

       There are so many other important aspects of poly relationships like commitment, love, honesty, intimacy, equality and many more. Like the many aspects of a poly relationship or for that matter a non-mon relationship, there are many types and variations of these relationships. Polyamory is different for each person and couple involved and there isn't a standard or "right" way to do it. You find what works for you, and look within at what you want and what you expect from a poly relationship. That being said poly or non-mon isn't right for everyone. Some people don't desire non-mon let alone polyamory, and that's fine too, find what works for you and what makes you happy and do that!